..............: June 2009

And I sit here, digging in my proverbial heels, procrastinating the sleep I so desperately need to get through tomorrow. Yep. Tomorrow. The day that my "legitimate" medical education begins (though the practical one started 12 years ago this September). I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!!! I start PA school tomorrow! Geeze, this is gonna be like the Uber-Mental-Ultra-Marathon of Doom! What the heck. I say, "Bring it." Show me a challenge, then watch me rock your faces off in amazement. ;0)

My friend, Erika, recently had her entire blog bound for posterity's sake, and it got my wheels turnin' (faster than usual -- but with actual direction this time!). I've journaled faithfully(-ish) since I was about the age of the average Hannah Montana fan. Sadly, once I got married, though, that went pretty much out the window...or it's just been teetering precariously... with about a dozen entries in the past eight years. (Hubby Dearest brags that it's because when I married him, all my dreams came true. Eh, I'll give him that. ;0)

But around New Year's time, I got to really thinking about the purpose of my journal and how to make the most of my entry time. It was then I realized this: if I want it to be useful to me (or my poor, unsuspecting posterity), I'll need to cut to the chase about WHAT I'VE LEARNED!!! Recently. In the past. Vicariously and through sad/happy/hilariously ironic, personal experience. Not exactly Pearls of Wisdom...maybe more like Pumice. OOH! Insightful AND exfoliating!

So here it is, folks: Life 101.

Everyone needs an advocate. (This cruel world has enough critics, thank you very much.)
Life is too short to own a David Spade movie.
As a man(die) thinketh, SO IS (S)HE!
Speak kindly. You never know who's defending you at this very moment.
New razors are NOT my friend.
Don't fear the mob. (Or the reaper. But a cowbell in the hands of Will Ferrell? Now that's something to fear.)
The chance that your 3-year-old will splatter an entire Costco-sized vat of a greasy, smelly substance all over your house is inversely proportional to the number of minutes since you scrubbed that house clean.
An experience is only bad if the lesson(s) went unlearned.
Practice makes permanent.
I run exactly like a lumberjack with a rash.
Feelings of inadequacy, insecurity and self-defeat are nothing more than a jealous Satan working overtime.
Swimming is fun...unless you're a cell phone.
While we're on the subject, Bella Dunkerella, electronic devices do NOT get thirsty. Ever.
Never underestimate Satan's craftiness.
It's not old people's fault. Sometimes they buy the car with the signal already on.
If less is more, think of how much more more would be.
Shampoo your carpets and you'd best prepare to clean up the ensuing pet barf.
The hardest climbs often bring the greatest perspective.
Journaling is cathartic. So is burning the bad parts.
We are REQUIRED to forgive all men.
Wanna serve the community? Avoid creating or perpetuating drama!
The only people who can be trusted 100% are immortal.
Before you despise someone for something about them, make sure you don't share that quality.
I don't care what Disneyland attraction your head is shaped like: Bic'n it is ALWAYS, ALWAYS, ALWAYS superior to a comb-over.
If you can only find one person in the world you can trust, make sure it's your spouse.
Time only heals what you let it.
Become a mom and you'd better be prepared to become a milk factory, a deflated off-road tire, late to everything, a binky, a broken record, a road hazard, a Nazi, a 24-hour on-call maidservant, a buzzkill, a sounding board and a launch pad. Often simultaneously. (Oh, and the happiest, most joyous, most eternally fulfilled person in the world.)
If a liar tells the truth in the woods and no one is around to hear it, would anyone have believed it anyway?
Satan can mimic everything but peace.
Hair growth follows gravity along the path of least resistance, old dude in the line at the grocery store. If you're missing it on your scalp, plan on mowing it out of other orifices.
There is no limit to the power of positive reinforcement. (This works as well for 4-year-olds as it does 49-year-olds.)
Moisturize, moisturize, moisturize.
Good music is just as medicinal as laughter.
Wouldn't you rather love someone more than they deserve than short them where they earned it?