Since I'm more consistent at studying than I am blogging...(brownie points for the RIGHT order???)...let's recap the 2009 Plays of the Year.
EARNED MY WHITE COAT!
That's right, Folks. This meaningless, ceremonial act of minionism hereby bequeaths upon us the authority to, uhh, wear a white coat, while we awkwardly perform our first pelvic exams and hernia checks on paid actors, ALL with quasi-professionalism!!!...???...
HAD A BIRTHDAY!
Nothing helps you celebrate your whitetrash roots like a hearty dose of MY DREAM CAKE (Thanks, Katie!), demolition derby championships, and Swine Flu via a trip to the State Fair! Hands-down the best birthday I've had ALL YEAR!!! I've come a long way in 26 years...
Not really. I'd still sell what's left of my soul for those SUH-WEET specs!
Oh, and for those who persist in asking where my kids got their blonde hair:
FOR THE LAST TIME, I USED TO BE BLONDE!!!!!!!!
Meanwhile, back at the blog...
WENT TO MY 10 year high school reunion! GO COYOTES!!!
(L->R: Me, Lisa, Rebecca & Kacie)
Equal parts thrilled to see my best friends from my past, tickled frickin' fuschia to weigh less than I did when I graduated (...& yet, no pic sans buffalo biceps?! What's that about?!), and heartbroken/entertained by my drunken classmates, trapped in their respective stages of accepting that they peaked in high school. There. I said it. C'mon, we were ALL thinkin' it!
WENT TO CALIFORNIA!!!
(L->R: Courtney, Noelle & Baylie.)
Saw cousins and my Bobbie Dearest, who live in Rancho Cucamonga (LA). Had my dad's planner stolen. No worries, though. It only held EVERYTHING he owns of value, including his social security card, ALL bank cards, check book, temple recommend, account numbers, and the social security number of all of his children. Good times were had by all.
Eh. Silver linings, a-plenty, right? Like that I'm an insomniac, so I wouldn't have been sleeping anyway, had I NOT been on hold with all the credit reporting agencies to put a block on my SSN. My poor dad, though! Almost feel as bad for the dirty thief/thieves who'll be eternally Hades-incinerated for buying a welder on his Home Depot card. Hope their most critical welds fail them at the most inopportune moment. RRRGH!!!
WENT TO UTAH!!!
If you squint your eyes and cross your fingers and click your heels three times and use your imagination (...you know, like my EKG professor tells me to when interpreting strips...to the tune of #32,500 a year tuition...AWESOME...), you can see my babies catching the first flakes of Noelle's first snow. Minutes later, the POURING ENSUED!!! Take my word for it. (As the sun shines fearlessly--misleadingly--in the photo.)
As much as I despise the state for stealing too many of my best friends and having the gloomy feel of a giant parking lot...some of its inhabitants are FANTABULOUS!!!
HUNG OUT WITH THE EVANSES!!!
We had a BLAST stayin' gold, rockin' Kari's grandma's house with our sparkling personalities and my killer sweet potato fries recipe. (C'mon, Gram-Grams, you know you loved us. Admit it.) Anecdotally, consult your friends before you cook something that no one in their family will eat. :0)
Sidenote: Egad, Crimony, and Hot dang! If you're a Surprise runner like me, you haven't run until you've tackled the inclines of Rancho Cucamonga, California and Brighton, Utah. With pharmaceutical assistance, the burn I feel is starting to fade...
HUNG OUT WITH THE MAUGHANS!!!
(NOT pronounced 'maw-OO-guh-hawn'...'cuz Cory's right: English IS hard!!!)
DANG, I miss them and our silly joint-family antics! Freaking peeing my pants with laughter. Ahh, good times with coagulated butt sauce. (I don't care. It was worth it to publish online, just to make Rachel laugh.)
SAW NEW MOON!!!
Fo reals, yo, it's all about the company you keep. Kari & Rachel, you're the reason for any/all warm fuzzies surrounding the flick.
The movie was, well, rich in comedic value, as was the first. I have to say how impressed I am that, on such a modest budget, they snagged a Wayans brother fresh of the set of 'White Chicks' to play Rosalie.
SERIOUSLY!!! Tell me I'm NOT the only one who sees this!!!!!!!!!!!!
SCORED NEW TUNAGE!!!
It was with a heavy heart that I composed yet another Craigslist ad and sold my beloved iPod...
...because I had to UPGRADE!!!
...To the 160G iPod!!!
...Jason got me for Christmas!!!
...Early!!!
CAN YOU FEEL THE EXCITEMENT?!?!
...Because I've been collecting on my own (Thanks Cory & Wal-Mart)...
...and because my very dear PA school friend, Chad, hooked me up with a plethora of musical deliciousness. (Chad, if you ever marry, have that vasectomy reversed, and need a surrogate because your wife is unable to bear you children, you just let me know.)
Drum roll, please...I now have...wait for it...~36G of music. Nothing like exorcising the demons in your current collection with some fresh blood. (Dang, I could really go for a super-smiley emoticon right now.)
GOT PULLED OVER...WHILE I WAS RUNNING!!!
Seriously, Officer Potbelly von BaldyMcNothingBetterToDo. Cut the crap. By telling me how I was 'violating city code' and other such nonsense, you "singlehandedly made real criminals' lives easier." -Officer Buhanan. Back all up off my nighttime-running-in-reflective-gear grill. Deuces.
MADE J'S CHRISTMAS WISH COME TRUE!!!
OK, so he had to work two months worth of overtime, and we spent an entire Saturday resurrecting a Franken-center for it:
(Before)
(After)
...SonOfA..................The camera just misses ALL of the blood, sweat & tears, I tell you!
But my husband has what he's been wanting for years!! No...not a medicated wife. Okay. I guess he got his SECOND WISH then. Semantics.
Surefire way to get me to buy into anything? Put rappin' Johnny Mayer on it. Survey says......I'M IN!!!
...and speaking of deliciousness...Review of his new album, Battle Studies?
The best way I can sum it up is this:
- If you went to Wal-Mart, paid the $9 plus tax, peeled off the impenetrable wrappers, opened it up, pulled out the cover insert, and threw the rest away...it would still be worth what you paid for the sheer poetic value of the lyrics alone.
I don't know if I'm biased. (Okay. Strike that. Of course I am.) I don't know if I've just been abysmally depressed because of the most difficult experiences of my life. (Translation: I am.) I don't know if we're just two peas in a tall, awkward, under-appreciated pod. But if it's possible to have a soul mate in a musician/artist, he's mine. That album...sigh...it's just SO VERY MUCH my life right now that if you buy it and aren't completely, 100% satisfied, I'll give you your money back...just to surround myself with the soundtrack of my 2009.
Some other must-have gems?- The Script
- Parachute
- Telescope
- Wheat (Per Second, Per Second, Per Second...Every Second)
- Kings of Leon
*A word of caution: The aforementioned albums will incite...
PARTYING LIKE ROCK STARS!!!
